Catch Up

I'm falling behind on regular blog updates. It's only been a couple weeks but I have tons of stories. So here they are in quick bullet form:

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  Four Henrys
  
  
  Russell's dad came up to visit his sons a couple of Fridays ago. The weekend involved Disneyland, food, and lots of movie-watching. Typical laid-back Henry weekend ;)
  
  

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  Before dinner
  
  
  Valentine's day also happened. I was showered with lots of love and presents. We even got dressed all fancy and went out to dinner in Laguna Beach.
  
  
  
  
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  Road trip!
  
  
  Last weekend, I went back up to Oroville with Russell and my two maids-of-honor. I wanted to show the girls the ranch where Russ and I were going to get married as well as have them help me with a few wedding planning details.
  
  

   
  A picture of when Ottley got under Russell's blanket.
  
  
  With Bernadette and Jessica while we look at baby sheep.

  
  

  

  In Sacramento :)

  
  

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  River and Russ
  
  
  On a happy and sad note, a few of our friends are leaving this week to go do amazing work in another country. The picture above was taken at one of their goodbye dinners. 
  
  
  
  
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  That's an apple pancake by the way
  
  
  On Sunday morning, I got to have breakfast with two high school friends and play catch up. We went to our favorite, regular breakfast spot—Original House of Pancakes. Marc ordered an apple pancake which I'm pretty positive is just an apple pie on top of a pancake.
  
  

   
  Yum.
  
  

  I got the german pancake which is always too big and always just right. Ah, just looking at this picture makes me want to go back again. Colleen got chocolate chip pancakes which I didn't take a picture of because I wanted to start eating my pancake as soon as it arrived. Enough food talk for this post.

  
  

  
  
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  Brett
  
  
  On Sunday, I also got to see my godson and finally give him his Christmas present. Look at Brett growing up too fast :(
  
  

• And last but not least...
  
   
  
  

  Russell's moving! We've spent the last couple of days trying to get their house all empty and cleared up. This gets me excited because it means we're that much closer to going apartment shopping (end of next month) and getting married. Ahh!

Overflowing

Stacks of unsent invitations sit on my desk: an address stamp, a pen, postage stamps, and empty envelopes. Library books are piled high next to them. Last minute cast off scarves are piled on top. When did my desk get so burdened?

My closet is bursting from clothes. I worry I will not know which to take and which to donate when it is time to get married and move. There's barely any room for anything new yet I continue to purchase the new. I want so much--clothes, money, beauty, everything. I want it all. 

The dresser is stacked with hair products and lotion. I want shiny hair. I want it silky like commercial-perfect women have their hair. A couple broken brushes are lying next to it. A box of Kleenex, a box of chocolate, and a can of candy hearts also join the chaos. My trash is close to full and God knows when that will get changed.

Scarves and purses hang behind my door. Books are bursting from my shelves. Headbands hang on my desk lamp. I have too much of everything but not enough. Totes, book bags, hats, jewelry, winter jackets, house slippers--they all play a part in the messiness. Discarded tap shoes are forgotten in my closet. Half-finished scrapbooks, hidden diaries, and even more secrets are hidden like jigsaw puzzles. I want to get rid of it all but I wouldn't know where to start.

Neglected knitting, random Christmas presents, old memorabilia, and other whatnots are clustered and ignored. I don't want to think about how my room used to be like when it was clean. I don't want to think about how it looks like now.

My life is overflowing. I have too much and I am too much. I am becoming a storage room of the present and the unused. The phrase My cup runneth over comes into mind and it is a sense of overwhelmingness that spills over. Instead of trying to make sense of all this chaos, I sit in the middle of it. 

Monday Night

This is what Russell and I did this Monday night. We went to a cozy little tea place, bought some macarons, and drank a pot of tea. I read on my Kindle while Russell finished up our wedding invitations. Some peace and relaxation while our wedding creeps closer.

Learning How to Love Each Other

Here are some of the questions Russell and I got asked in our latest premarital counseling session:

1. What is your definition of marriage?
2. What is your definition of love?
3. How do you know you are in love with each other?

Our assignment is to write a couple paragraphs on the questions our pastor gives us after every session. But, we can't discuss it with each other until the next time we meet with him. Then during the next session, we read out loud what we wrote.

We learned a few things in our last counseling. For example, we discussed each other's primary and least love languages (Katrina: Quality Time and Acts of Kindness with the least being Verbal compared to Russell who is: Touch and Verbal with the least being Gifts). We kind of had an idea of each other's primary love language but our pastor made sure we knew it and will remember it. I had to make a mental note of to stop joking to Russell that I don't think he loves me enough...I guess that communicates to him that I don't think he loves me? (Sorry Russ!) Since Verbal isn't a love language I utilize often, I need to watch what I say to Russell—even if it's a slight joke—in case it might be hurting his feelings. And when I realized that Gifts was Russell's least love language, it all made sense why he never gets as excited as I do when I buy him a shirt or something random (It's 'cause I love you okay? Not just because I like buying things). 

With Quality Time and Acts of Kindness/Service, I like spending lots of time with Russell (like, ALL the time) and packing him lunch in the morning and dropping it off his car before I head to work. Russell likes being hugged all the time and is a cuddler. When we first started dating, I realized all his family members were big time huggers and I always attributed this characteristic to their long arms. As in, they have long arms so they feel the need to give bear hugs. Nope, it's a love language...combined with long arms. Russell is also very verbal with his I love you's  which honestly freaked me out at the beginning of our relationship.

We also discussed the different kinds of love. One of the questions our pastor asked was: What makes your love for your future spouse any different than the love you have for your mother, friend, etc.? The three loves our pastor emphasized was Agape (the greatest love, God's love, unconditional love), Phileo (brotherly love), and Eros (passionate and romantic love). All three are required in a marriage. When agape love is nurtured and healthy, the other two loves will follow. Eros and phileo feed off agape. When you get down to it, we need God's love in order to fully love our spouse. 

(Source: danipupani)